Stephen Colbert on Democrats' apathy: Let them eat cheesecake.

What's to become of the Democratic party?

For starters, hide your chocolate cheesecake.

Comedian Stephen Colbert, said Tuesday night on "The Colbert Report," that the "Democrats' self-loathing has gotten so bad they've changed their symbol from the silhouette of a donkey to Eeyore eating a whole chocolate cheesecake."

The Democrats, according to Colbert, are not feeling quite as perky as they have in the past. And we don't think its just cause they've overdosed on comfort food.

He says they're being buried alive by apathy, a feeling of "Meh," a lack of enthusiasm, perhaps brought on by a severe (and apparently contagious) case of whining. Even artist Shepard Fairey, creator of the Obama "Hope" campaign poster, is feeling the "meh."

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On Monday, Vice President Joe Biden told the Democrats to "stop whining and get out there and look at the alternatives." Or as Jay Leno mentioned on "The Tonight Show" Tuesday, "Buck up."

"But of course, with Joe Biden, you're never quite sure what he said. As you know, Biden's bucked up a number of times," Leno joked.

Monitor staff writer Peter Grier has a better idea for Biden:

As he heads to Penn State Tuesday for a big afternoon rally intended to fire up the youth vote, maybe Biden will keep this in mind: He shouldn’t have told party activists to stop whining. No, he should have told them to stop yawning.

The way Colbert sees it, the Democrats have two choices:

• They can stand up and fight - "But that sounds hard."
• They can lay down "and let a wave of conservative enthusiasm bury you alive" because, "after all, it's comfortable down there," Colbert said, speaking into and shoveling dirt on a mock grave.

"It's just the control of Congress!" Colbert rationalizes.

Colbert asked Democratic Strategist Paul Begala how Democrats can fire the party up so that they're at least merely indifferent to the 2010 elections.

Begala's solution: "They need to rise up out of that grave, grab this shovel, and smack John Boehner upside his orange head, how about that?"

Frankly, that sounds a tad violent. What else do you have Mr. Begala?

"Sun Tzu, [author of] 'The Art of War,' said to kill the enemy, we must rouse our troops to anger. And right now, the Democrats are not being roused to anger, they're being roused to apathy," Begala said.

"You're talking about the Tea Partiers, who are, might I say the more extreme version of the Republican party right now. Why don't the Democrats have one of those?"

What ever happened to the Coffee Party?

So is anger the new way to drive party unity and call the Democrats to (enthusiastic) action?

"You say Obama needs a visible enemy to attack. Wouldn't it be better for the Democrats if they lost Congress, so Obama had a Republican Congress to attack for 2012?" Colbert suggests to Begala.

It sounds like Colbert's final answer for the Democrats: "Just keep turning in your grave."

Does President Obama have a different solution? Check out Monitor staff writer Peter Grier's look today at what Obama's going to do to fire up the Democrats.

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