It’s possible that a “right” – or at least better – way to tackle the issues of motherhood will emerge from the debate.
Perhaps there are “right answers” to these questions about whether to breastfeed, use Pinterest, or stay at home. Or at the very least, maybe there is a better way to think about them or handle the accompanying decisions – both for the benefit of individual mothers and for society as a whole.
But that better way will only emerge if we keep debating, if we keep talking, differing, and sharing our views.
Of course, the language of “war” is overblown. It, too, is a reflection of America’s larger “culture wars,” and all the other hyperbolic “wars” we are waging. The terms of our discourse about motherhood, as in all things, should aim to be more civilized, less incendiary, more constructive and cooperative. But that doesn’t mean the discourse – the disagreement – should stop.
Mothers should not be afraid to dig into the trenches, fire the first shot, and fight on. In other words, inform yourself, take a position, and defend it. But do it kindly and constructively, like a good mom.
Jill Abraham Hummer is an assistant professor of political science and women’s studies at Wilson College, in Chambersburg, Penn. She is also mom to a 3-year-old and 7-month-old.
