Toddler advises against restaurant dining with the family. "There is only one course that your toddler is interested in: the bread," Toddler wrote. "Order the fifteen-dollar macaroni and cheese or chicken strips if you must, but understand that you'll be taking it home to feast on at midnight (as if we don't know)... .Restaurant behaviors that are perfectly normal but generally distasteful to adults include staring. Like most toddlers, I take extreme delight in making adults feel uncomfortable through my laser beam-like gaze focused directly on a grown-up's face. You'll notice that your child is expressionless as he drills a hole into his target using an intense glare. The joy experienced by your toddler compares to the feeling parents get when five or more people like their Facebook status update."
