‘Stiffen your spine’: Breakfast with outgoing press secretary Jen Psaki

The life of a White House press secretary isn’t easy. Reporters coming at you at all hours for answers, asking the same questions over and over. The fear that you’ll be caught off guard by a question, live on television. The nonstop ferreting out of answers from inside the White House – essentially, being a reporter yourself – so that you fully understand an issue and can explain it to the public.

But for Jen Psaki, who finishes her 16-month stint as White House press secretary on Friday, the hardest part for her personally, she says, is the threats.

“I have had nasty letters, texts to me with my personal address, the names of my children. It crosses lines, you know, and that’s when it becomes a little scary,” says Ms. Psaki, speaking to reporters Thursday at a breakfast hosted by The Christian Science Monitor.

While protesters haven’t shown up at her house, as has been happening to Supreme Court justices this week over the abortion issue, Ms. Psaki says the threats have become common – and alarming. In some cases, she’s had to share information with the Secret Service.

“It is a sign of the venom that we see out there in society,” she says. 

“I recognize I’m in many ways a public figure. People can like me, dislike me. That’s OK. And I believe very much in free speech,” she adds. But “my kids are 4 and 6, and I worry about their safety.”

Ms. Psaki has ready advice for her successor, Karine Jean-Pierre, who will be both the first Black and first openly gay person to serve as White House press secretary. The advice comes via Ms. Psaki’s mom, who is a therapist with a bit of “a hippie vibe,” as Ms. Psaki puts it.

“She said to me before my first briefing, ‘Stiffen your spine and keep your feet planted on the ground, and nobody can waver you,’” Ms. Psaki says, getting a bit emotional.

Fun fact: Ms. Psaki conducted more briefings than all of the press secretaries of the Trump era combined. Including her briefing Thursday afternoon, Ms. Psaki’s total is 223, compared with 205 in four years of President Donald Trump, according to Martha Joynt Kumar, an expert on presidential communications.

The C-SPAN video of the breakfast can be viewed here.

During the hourlong session, Ms. Psaki discussed topics ranging from a moment in the briefing room she wishes she could do over to how her children help her do her job.

The following excerpts have been lightly edited for clarity.

On a briefing room moment Ms. Psaki wishes she could do over – the time in December when she snapped at a reporter about the idea of sending free COVID-19 test kits to every American:

The truth is, if you look back at the transcript, I had said about 9,000 words about what we had done for testing, expanding markets, making tests available, funding. ... And I think it was by about the ninth or 10th version of the question that I think I had just hit my limit, and, you know, we’re all human.

But it is your job to control that urge and to always provide information, context, all the details – even if people in the room sometimes look like their eyes may roll back in their head because they’re kind of bored of the same question. And that was a good lesson for me.

Now I will say, just to go back to the context, I was asked, “Why wouldn’t we send tests to every American?” We have still not done that. And if we had done that, I would still say it would have been a waste of taxpayer money. People wouldn’t have used them – they would have thrown them out. But I did not provide the context, and the tone was not right in that moment.

On what her children think about her work:

My son may or may not still think I work at the Honda dealership at the top of the street. He loves cars, so I take that as a massive compliment.

When I was discussing this job, I took my [then-5-year-old] daughter out for ice cream. And I prepared this speech in my head, how Joe Biden was elected to be president. That nice man. ... I said, “He’s asked me if I can go help him. And I want to do this because it’s important for our country, but it’s going to be a sacrifice. And that way it’s going to be a sacrifice for you, too, for the country.”

I felt really good about myself. And I said, “So what do you think? Does that make sense?” And she said, “Not really, Mom.” She took another lick at her ice cream.

On how being a parent helps her do her job:

There is a hectic, wild roller coaster every morning and day. But I also think that being a mom and a parent brings a different perspective to this job.

I live in a suburban community outside of Washington, D.C. When I have conversations with people on the street, it’s not about where the reconciliation bill is, even in northern Virginia. It is about, are we wearing masks or are we not wearing masks? When are kids’ vaccines going to be available? Is our health really at risk?

Often, it’s not political at all. Sometimes it’s about what is happening at your school or when the leaves are going to be picked up. And that perspective, being a mom, recognizing the challenges people go through as it relates to COVID – schools being closed, the challenge and the pressure on families, worries about mental health impact – those are all things I live in my daily life.

On why President Biden – who had promised to fire anyone who treated a colleague with disrespect – didn’t immediately fire deputy press secretary T.J. Ducklo in February 2021 when he threatened to “destroy” a female reporter:

Let me just say first that I hope anyone on my team or my colleagues would say that what I’ve done in this job is try to create an environment of respect for the media.

What I can say, reflecting back on that, is that obviously what he said and what he conveyed is completely unacceptable and did not meet the standard the president set, and the standard I set.

What I would also say, though, is that we have to think very carefully. He is somebody who is in his young 30s, a survivor of cancer, had been on the campaign for two years.

That does not make what he said and did acceptable. But I also believe that what we need to do as people, as leaders, as bosses, as mentors is to show people how to handle things correctly and with compassion and with empathy and help people find the right way back. And that is also important, as we’re thinking about people who make mistakes, who act in a way that doesn’t meet the bar. That should be a standard in the workplace.

On whether she will miss Peter Doocy, the Fox News reporter with whom she often spars:

I will. I think we have a very good professional relationship, and I understand that he’s coming there to ask questions every day that are important to report and to the outlet he works for, and I respect that, and we have healthy debates and discussions. It doesn’t mean I agree with his line of questioning on most days, but I’ve called on him every day he’s been there – or a Fox person, Jacqui [Heinrich], who’s been there a lot as well.

We’re sending the message to the country that we’re not focused here on a fight with Fox. We’re focused here on the work of the American people, which is very important to the president, the first lady, and me in this job, in this moment in history.