Appreciation that heals and renews relationships

In today’s world, there seem to be many opportunities for relationships to be challenged by misunderstanding, hurt, or distance – whether amongst friends, within families, or in communities. When such moments arise, a deeper, spiritually grounded appreciation can help us reconnect.

Appreciating others on this spiritual basis isn’t about admiring personal traits. It goes beyond what the human senses tell us. It’s a prayerful acknowledgment of the divine qualities expressed in those around us – qualities that come from God, divine Love itself. This kind of appreciation affirms that each of us is spiritual and whole, because we are God’s children.

The Apostle Paul, a follower of Jesus, encouraged, “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you” (I Thessalonians 5:18). This suggests that appreciation shouldn’t just be reactive, but proactive. It can be a recognition of ever-present good expressed by God.

I remember a time when a friendship I cherished was strained by a disagreement. For weeks, there was silence between us. I wrestled with the disappointment, but eventually, I turned to prayer. I asked, “What is it that truly connects us?” The answer came gently: our shared reflection of divine Love.

I began to mentally affirm the spiritual qualities we both express: compassion, honesty, humor, patience. These aren’t just human traits; they’re the reflection of God’s nature in each of us. Rather than trying to fix the situation, I let my thought rest in this appreciation of what was already spiritually true.

This shift brought peace. And when we finally spoke again, there was no need to relive the disagreement. The conversation was warm, sincere, and full of mutual respect. And this harmony has continued in our relationship and deepened it. It has felt as though our bond has been lifted to a more spiritual foundation, its true foundation, which isn’t breakable, because it doesn’t rely on personalities or emotions.

“Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures” by Mary Baker Eddy, the discoverer of Christian Science, says, “Gratitude is much more than a verbal expression of thanks. Action expresses more gratitude than speech” (p. 3). As in my experience, the most meaningful actions come from letting a spiritual sense of appreciation guide how we see and treat others.

Loving God and His creation in this way isn’t about ignoring issues or pretending things are perfect. It’s about witnessing only the spiritual truth that each of us is made wholly good, in God’s image. Consistently looking for and acknowledging divine qualities in one another is a healing activity.

This approach doesn’t just bless individual relationships; it can heal division in communities, inspire respect across deep-seated differences, and strengthen our understanding of the spiritual unity that underlies all of humanity. We all have the ability to recognize that we are never separate from God, Love, or from one another. We are all held together, in unity with God.