Parenting with less stress

Most would agree that raising kids is sometimes tough. But parenting difficulties can serve as a catalyst for making a great discovery: God is the true Parent of us all. God, our Father-Mother, is parenting everyone with a never-ending love. Knowing this can dissolve stress and fear and provide a solid spiritual footing for good parenting.

Jesus knew better than anyone that God was his Parent. He leaned on God to meet his own needs and proved that God, divine intelligence and Love, was always meeting the needs of others too. The discoverer of Christian Science, Mary Baker Eddy, wrote, “God is the parent Mind, and man is God’s spiritual offspring,” and “According to divine Science, man is in a degree as perfect as the Mind that forms him” (“Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures,” pp. 336, 337).

That phrase “in a degree” is often used to mean “to some extent.” But the way I see it, as it relates to the bond between Mind and man, “degree” is a term signifying our direct descent from our creator. It speaks to the uninterrupted line and constant relationship we all have with God, and which the life and healings of Jesus illustrated.

We are each directly descended from Mind, making us the undeviatingly perfect reflection of divine intelligence. What a boon it is to know that the guidance we need comes from God and that nothing can come between us and the good God gives.

Jesus once said, “All things are delivered unto me of my Father” (Matthew 11:27). Yielding to Mind as the deliverer of right ideas when we need them can do so much when the duties of parenting feel stressful. It can also help us be alert to ways in which tasks or demands can pile on without contributing to the peace and joy of the household.

When our daughter’s piano lessons turned into a battle of wills, my prayer brought to light the idea that it was not human will but understanding the reality of Mind’s harmony that must determine the priorities in our home. I then saw that the piano lessons reflected more my own desire to play than any genuine interest on her part. Humbled, I stopped imposing my will. We found another activity that better suited her needs, and I started practicing the piano more.

In another instance, our home became stirred up over a hairdo. At school, should our daughter wear her hair in a ponytail as my husband wished, or down, as she preferred? The battle lines were drawn and neither side was budging.

I then realized that the hairstyle battle revealed something deeper in her dad, an underlying fear for her safety when outside of his direct influence. I took the situation up in prayer to know God to be the only ruling Mind in our household, parenting us all with intelligence and protecting us from the imposition of fear.

Paul, a follower of Jesus, wrote, “I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:38, 39). Jesus taught that no fear, no danger, no personal will, no bad experiences, no arbitrary influences, ever separate us from our security in Mind or from the unceasing good that Mind, God, freely provides us.

Reflecting God as our parent Mind, my husband and I would express the spiritual intuition, wisdom, and necessary alertness that would show us the best way to keep our daughter safe wherever she was. But fear and willfulness never appropriately determine right action, and I recognized that they had no place or influence in our home.

When I discussed with him what had come to me in prayer, my husband began to feel more generally tranquil. I also encouraged our daughter to be mindful of her dad’s unflagging love for her and to respectfully consider his point of view. We never had another hairdo skirmish. Other circumstances regarding fearful control relaxed, too, making for a more harmonious father-daughter relationship.

Whether or not we have children of our own, we all have a part in expressing our Father-Mother God’s parenting love. As we understand this, we will see and experience Mind’s intelligence, provision, and care nurturing, teaching, guiding, and protecting parents, their children, and all. We all can find in God the joy of Mind’s perfect parenting that leaves no one out.