‘I have enough’ – an Esau prayer for everyone
While a friend and I were catching up one day, we noted how engaging in social media can make it seem like other people have so much more than we do. As we talked further, we realized that probably everyone on the planet feels they lack something.
There’s nothing new with that. The biblical story of Jacob and his brother Esau, for instance, captures hurt, envy, and the friction of broken relationships. Though they are twins, Esau, by virtue of his birth order, is to inherit the family wealth and receive their father’s spiritual blessing. But Jacob finds ways to end up with both. Furious, Esau vows to kill his brother. And Jacob goes on the run for many years.
The Bible follows Jacob’s slow but steady increase of both family and wealth during his time abroad. Eventually he feels God calling him back to his own home. On the way, he receives news that his brother is coming to meet him, with 400 men – an ominous welcome.
Fearing that he and his family will be slaughtered, Jacob sends many gifts ahead of him to try and placate the brother whose birthright he had taken. After a transformative night of spiritual wrestling within himself, Jacob goes out to his brother. But instead of expressing anger, Esau embraces him with tears of joy.
And the gifts that had been sent ahead? Esau tries to decline them with the extraordinary response, “I have enough, my brother” (Genesis 33:9).
The Bible doesn’t chronicle Esau’s own journey from feeling unjustly deprived to this expression of true grace, but Christian Science has given me an appreciation for how anyone can find a genuine peace and abundance in their own life. It begins with understanding God as infinite good and each of us as entirely spiritual, created by God to reflect and receive that spiritual goodness without measure. Holding to this truth, even when human circumstances present exactly the opposite, brings blessings.
By the middle of the Great Recession of 2008-2009, our family’s finances had ebbed to an unsustainable level. My husband’s work had dried up, and people were unable to compensate me for the work I was doing. There wasn’t anything left we could sell or borrow against to pay bills that were coming due. It was hard not to feel victimized by what experts said was an economic downturn created by the unscrupulous actions of others.
As I prayed, I felt Esau’s words speak to my heart. Would I continue to feel cheated and angry? Or could I say with him, “I have enough, my brother”?
I realized there was a spiritual richness to discover that couldn’t be undermined by anyone or anything. Next to a favorite paragraph of mine in “Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures” by Mary Baker Eddy, there’s a marginal heading that says, “Inexhaustible divine Love” (p. 494), referring to God.
This speaks to God’s unlimited care for all of us. Unmeasurable. Boundless. Inexhaustible. Unconfined by economic laws insisting on too many needs and too few resources.
Within that paragraph is this affirmation: “Divine Love always has met and always will meet every human need.” I knew from experience that God’s law, which is wholly spiritual and good, overrules human inequities. Divine resources are there for all of us. No one is left out. And the emphasis on “always” can’t be missed.
But there’s a demand to acknowledge, through prayer, the spiritual power undergirding that law. Then we see and experience the love of God more tangibly, even where we’re confronted with loss and lack.
It came to me to begin a gratitude journal. It was easier than I thought it would be. Sometimes it was the sweetness of little things that melted me the most – a child’s exuberance in the supermarket, a cat purring next to me on the sofa. This wasn’t just an exercise in listing good things, though. It included an active acknowledgment of divine Love’s supremacy, and alertness to evidence of Love’s care each day.
Before long, I was recording an outpouring of kindness and generosity from family and friends. And new business opportunities and payments presented themselves unexpectedly. We found we had all we needed and more.
We all have the innate spiritual discernment that enables us to recognize divine Love as truly infinite and always present. As children of God – of Love – the infinitude of God’s goodness is our rich inheritance, at every moment. Christ Jesus taught us that this abundance includes joy, generosity, kindness, and even forgiveness. It fills our hearts to overflowing and impels an effortless embracing of others.
When faced with any sense of human injustice or inequity, we can look to God for a more profound sense of all that inexhaustible Love gives us. From this basis we can begin our prayer with, “I have enough. We have enough.” And then we can let Love show us how.